Shattered Glass

[Zetti]

With a special appearance by Master Jamie Jefferies just for Zetti, as promised, I hereby present....

Thanks Louise

"Everyone else got Donald Duck ones but I sent you a Mickey Mouse one because you're my favouritest!" he announced almost making her melt.

Such a cute Jamie moment. Definitely one for the Jamie cutie hall of fame :D

[bikinikill]

and i can't wait for when he finally calls her mum. that will be too cute.

bk

Who said that was ever going to happen?

Thanks for the comments guys.

i can dream. haha

[Louise_2983]

Chapter 21

“So are you ever going to ask?” she asked as he brushed past her to pour himself another cup of coffee from the pot. He put down the mug he was clutching and slowly turned towards her. He watched her intently for a few seconds before gently brushing her cheek with his fingertips and grazing her other cheek with his soft lips. She didn’t react to the affection, standing frozen and unfeeling as though she were a block of ice.

“I figured you’d tell me in your own time babe” he told her nonchalantly, going back to his coffee.

“So I disappear for a month with no explanation and someone almost killed you on my behalf last night but you’re fine to just wait for me to enlighten you on why when I’m ready?”

“I guess” he shrugged.

“You don’t even care do you?” she sighed.

“B of course I care but it’s never been what we’ve been about has it? Feelings and stuff?”

“ No I guess not!” she snapped angrily.

“Because then one of us might actually have to have some!”

“B I h-“

“Don’t call me that!”

“What B? I always call you that?”

“And I’ve always hated it” she confessed with a sigh.

“Then you should have said so, it’s only been 3 years” he told her sarcastically.

“It was all part of it” she whispered quietly.

“Pretending to be someone I’m not. All this...” she told him gesturing to the two of them.

“It’s all a big pretence and we both know it”

“I’m not pretending” he stated simply and in that moment she realised his words were true. He never actually pretended that he felt anything more than he did, he just her let do it and allowed other

people to make their own presumptions.

“No, because I pretend for the both of us”

“So” he looked down at her expectantly, his perfectly styled jet black hair falling around his face.

“If you’re only pretending to be Belle Taylor then who are you?”

“Belle Jefferies” she whispered, biting her lower lip almost nervously.

“And that guy who tried to attack you last night, well that was my husband...or at least he used to be”

“Your husband?” he questioned, still not showing any sign or shock or that he even cared.

“Yeah” she nodded.

“And the father of my son”

“Well I guess that explains the scar”

“You knew!” she exclaimed in disbelief.

“You knew all this time and you never thought to mention it?”

“Well, I didn’t know what had happened to the kid. I figured you’d tell me about it if you wanted to”

“His name’s Jamie and he’s 5 on Saturday” she clarified.

“So he didn’t die?”

“No! God don’t even say that!” she yelped in horror at his words. The thought alone was enough to break her heart.

“When he was born things were pretty bad. I had post natal depression and I couldn’t cope so I left. I fell apart and then I was too scared to come back for a long time. I let him down and I’m not going

to do it again. I’m back here for good Johnny, I’m not going back to LA”

“You can’t seriously be expecting me to move here?” he laughed at the mere suggestion.

“I definitely don’t want that” she told him adamantly.

“Are you...breaking up with me?” he half laughed, not quite sure he was understanding correctly.

“Yes I am. But don’t worry you can tell the press that you ended things, keep up your image and all that. I don’t care, I never cared, not really Johnny”

“Don’t sugar coat it will you babe?” he chuckled.

“You don’t care either Johnny. If you did you wouldn’t sleep with anything in a skirt”

“I care” he told her ignoring her comment but tellingly not denying it either.

“Maybe not as much as I should but I do care Belle, you mean a lot to me”

“You have no idea how little care you’ve actually shown me sometimes” she whispered.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means you don’t rape the people you care about Johnny!” she snapped, tears suddenly appearing from nowhere and beginning to take a sloppy trail mascara from each eye to her pale lips.

“Rape?! What the hell are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about you raping me. I thought that was pretty obvious”

“I think I’d remember that Belle!” he yelled, his tone and body language radiating fury at her words.

“Not when you were so high that you couldn’t even remember your own name! Or what the word no meant!”

“I wouldn’t” he gulped in shock as her words registered with him and reverberated through his brain. He only had to look at the heartbroken expression occupying her face to know that she was telling

the truth.

He sank into the armchair behind him and buried his head in his hands, hiding the pain etched on his breathtaking face.

“When?” he whispered.

“About 18 months ago” she replied quietly and he sighed, a mixture of pain and confusion.

“Don’t worry, I won’t let it get out I know it would ruin your reputation”

“Do you seriously think that’s what I’m worried about? Belle, I can’t believe I did that to you. I can’t believe I hurt you like that and you just stuck around and didn’t say a word”

“I was a mess already, it was just another thing to hide away from”

“I’m so sorry” he whispered and she could tell his words were sincere as he looked up at her through long, dark eyelashes.

“I love you B, I may not be in love with you but I do love you. And I treat you like S**t most of the time, there’s no excuse for that”

She knelt down next to him and placed a soothing hand on his forearm. She couldn’t quite believe that he had raped her and yet she was the one offering comfort.

“No there’s not. But I let you treat me like that. I could have walked away at any time but it was easier to stay and let you walk all over me than it was to face all my other problems. I was a coward but

now I’m dealing with all the things I should have dealt with a long time ago and even if it that didn’t have to involve moving back here it would always involve walking away from you”

“I’m surprised you’re not running” he laughed quietly.

“I don’t know how you can even look at me, I’m so ashamed”

“That would kind of make me a hypocrite. I’m not the only one with problems, you need to get help too. The drugs Johnny, it’s getting way out of control...”

“Getting? I’d say we were a lot further along than that considering what I did to you!”

“You need to go to rehab or something”

“I know, I know I’ve got a problem but it helps me forget”

“Forget what?” she whispered looking at him expectantly.

He dipped his head, breaking eye contact and sighed deeply.

“Johnny?”

“About 12 years ago I caused a really bad car accident, I was young and drunk and my girlfriend was in the car with me. I killed her Belle and then I panicked and I moved her into the driver’s seat so

no one would know it was me. The post mortem showed that she was pregnant. I killed my girlfriend and our baby Belle and I wasn’t even man enough to take responsibility for it!”

“Johnny” she sighed, wrapping her arms around him and pulling him into a comforting embrace. As he rested his head on her shoulder she knew she would never tell him about the child she had

aborted, She knew what it was like to lose a child through no fault of your own but for him to blame himself for the loss of two wouldn’t do anyone any good.

“Looks like you’re not the only one hiding from your problems huh?” he shrugged as he raised his head to look at her.

“I took heroin once” she blurted out suddenly.

“Just before I met you. I was a mess and I wanted to forget but I had a pretty bad experience and I ended up fitting and in hospital. It really scared me so I never did it again but I understand how you could turn to drugs to forget because I did it too”

“This husband of yours...”

“Ex-husband” she corrected.

“Does he know what I did to you?”

She nodded apologetically.

“No wonder he wanted to kill me” he sighed before raising his hand to gently brush her wounded face.

“And you got hurt then too. God it seems all I’ve ever done is hurt you”

“I used you just as much as you used me” she shrugged.

“Do you love him?”

“He’s remarried”

“That’s not what I asked” he looked at her knowingly.

“Yes. I love him, I’ve always loved him. Life just got in the way a bit that’s all”

“Then I hope you work things out. Seriously Belle, I want you to be happy”

“Thanks but like I said he’s married”

“And attacking guys for hurting his ex-wife. He’s clearly not over you B and who could blame him?”

“Because I’m just that great!” she laughed, a hint of sarcasm undercutting her voice.

“You are” he whispered quietly.

“And I am so sorry I ever let you get involved with me.”

“I’m a big girl Johnny”

“I’m sorry I ever hurt you” he sighed.

“Let’s just agree to stop apologising to each other and do something about our problems hey?” she suggested with a small smile.

“Deal?”

“Deal” he nodded as she hugged him to her again.

“I should go” he whispered.

“I’m sure you don’t want to look at me any longer than you have to”

“Johnny! Stop it!” she snapped.

“it’s 2am, you can’t go anywhere now”

“I’ll just find a motel or somewhere to crash and then I’ll be on the first flight out of her tomorrow I promise”

“You’re staying here tonight no arguments”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I don’t want to say goodbye to you when we’re both like this. No matter how we feel we’ve been part of each other’s lives for a long time now and I’m not going to let you walk out of here and

beat yourself up about all this. Just stay and calm down and then you can go back to LA tomorrow”

“Are you sure?” he questioned again.

She nodded silently and pressed a tender kiss to his temple.

***

“Belle? Are you ready to go to the animal park?” he asked excitedly as he bounded into the kitchen, Aden trailing behind him carrying a Mickey Mouse backpack.

“Almost, I just need to finish making our picnic” she smiled down at her son before looking up at Aden and hissing at him.

“You’re early!”

“Yeah, sorry I didn’t think it would be a problem. I need to get to a training course I’m doing today”

“Am I a problem?” Jamie asked sadly, misunderstanding the conversation between his parents.

Instantly Belle scooped him up into her arms and covered his cheek in kisses as he squirmed in a fit of giggles.

“You are never a problem Jamie” she assured him.

“My favourite boy is always welcome here”

“Well that’s me sorted then” Aden grinned, leaning casually against the counter.

“But what about Jamie?”

“Ha ha” Belle pretended to be amused.

“Your Daddy thinks he’s a comedian Jamie! But he’s not as funny as he thinks he is!”

“I think Daddy’s funny” Jamie defended Aden.

“That’s right mate” Aden grinned.

“You remember whose team you’re on here!”

“Just as long as you’re prepared to be on the losing team!” Belle chuckled.

“Anytime you want to transfer Jamie, you’re first choice on my list”

“Can’t I be on both teams?” he asked sweetly.

“I’m sure we can make an exception sweetie” Belle grinned pressing a kiss to his temple just as her bedroom door swung open.

“B, where are th-“

“Who are you?!” Jamie exclaimed, his eyes wide in shock as he took in the sight before him.

“Erm, this is my friend Johnny” Belle cringed.

“Johnny this is Jamie, my son”

“Why doesn’t he have any clothes on?” Jamie hissed in horror at Belle as he stared at Johnny wearing nothing but a tiny pair of underpants.

“Erm, he was hot. But he’s getting dressed now aren’t you Johnny?” she prompted, her face flushed bright red as she squirmed.

“Yeah, sure I am” he shifted uncomfortably not sure how to deal with a 4 year old.

“And why did he come out of your bedroom?!”

“He was tired, he needed at nap”

“It’s 8am silly!” Jamie looked at her in disbelief.

“Daddy sleeps in the same bedroom as Kirsty and they’re married. Are you married?” Jamie asked, this time looking directly at Johnny for a response.

“No, we’re just friends” Belle hurriedly interrupted.

“Friends who kiss?” he asked, eyeing Johnny up and down suspiciously, shuddering in horror as he spoke the final word.

“Erm, not anym-“

“No! No we don’t kiss!” Belle interrupted Johnny, scared at how much detail he may go into with her 4 year old son.

“Does he live here now?”

“No sweetie, he lives in America. He’s going back today”

“Good!” Jamie declared without a hint of an apology.

“You’re my Belle, I don’t want to share you with him. You’re my friend”

Aden chuckled at this. Normally he would launch into a lecture about learning to share but in this case he couldn’t agree with his son more. He didn’t want to share Belle with Johnny either.

“I’m going to get dressed, I’ve got a plane to catch” Johnny muttered before hastily retreating back into the bedroom.

“Can I watch TV?” Jamie asked.

“Ten minutes while I finish the picnic” she agreed lowering him to the ground and watching him rush towards the sofa before turning to Aden.

“Did you hear what he called me?”

“Belle?”

“No” she smiled.

“My Belle. He called me my Belle”

“Is that what Johnny calls you too? What are you doing Belle?” he hissed in a whisper so Jamie wouldn’t hear.

“It’s none of your business Aden”

“Sleeping with him after what he did to you?”

“Look you don’t know him ok? You only know what I’ve told you and there’s more than that”

“I don’t care what there is, he raped you. How can you let him touch you after that?”

“I think that’s my business” she snapped as Jamie chuckled at the cartoon he was watching on TV.

“Now haven’t you got a training course to go to?”

“I told you I don’t want him near Jamie!”

“He’s leaving” she told him adamantly before pushing him towards the door.

“And so are you”

[leah1234]

aaw jamie is so cute!!!!!!

if aden's going to stop belle from seeing people than he better leave kirsty!!!!!!

great update as per!!!!!!

update soon

xxxxxxx

[Red Ranger 1]

Really good chapter.I like the way you wrote Johnny, as someone who was totally messed up but who you could actually believe Belle would stay with for so long.Surprised Aden didn't have a stronger reaction to seeing him but maybe he's learnt his lesson.Love how Belle was so affected by Jamie calling her "my Belle".

[bikinikill]

oh blimey. louise that was really good. but why oh why, please tell me she didn't actually sleep with him and it was all just a big misunderstanding. surely she isn't that silly. oh blimey.

and aden is still so jealous. so jealous of johnny. he wants belle so bad. is it because he's scared she'll leave again? i wish they would just sit down and talk like normal adults and sort it out. hah.

but in saying all that, i really love this story. i'm glad johnny is leaving. and jamie was so cute. when he said, "friends that kiss?" hehe. so cute. and he called her my belle. ohh. and aden thinking he didn't want to share belle either. but she doesn't want to share him with kirsty.

really good louise. you get me so wound up though. i think thats just because its really good. and i'm really into the story. you are a great writer.

looking forward to the next chapter.

[LAURZY!]

Aden's got alot of double standards going on here, he really needs to look at himself before telling Belle who she can and cant see!! *mini rant over*

LOVED Jamie he is adorable, he called her "my Belle" that is just so adorable

Kinda felt sorry for Johnny, their convo was really good and so well written

Brilliant update as per, your such a good writer! looking forward to more

[Louise_2983]

Surprised Aden didn't have a stronger reaction to seeing him but maybe he's learnt his lesson.

It was because Jamie was there, he would never want him to see his father like that.

[xknomex]

I'm with Laura, on Adens double standards but I still love him although he acted very well when he saw Johnny being there.

I have to admit Johnny's not as bad as I thought he would be

Yay there was Jamie, he's just sooo cute. when he said "my Belle" and the stuff about the teams, brilliant!!!!

once again a brilliant chapter

xxx

[Taniya_K]

Awwwwwwwwwww! Jamie! *heart melts* He's just toooo cute! Can I have him please?! Please?! 'My Belle' was just so sweet! He's not calling her 'Mum' yet but he's getting there!

I cannot believe I'm going to say this, but I loved that bit with Johnny and Belle talking. I actually felt sympathy for him, and what he did was horrible even if he doesn't reember it and regrets it. That's how great your writing is!

Did not like Johnny coming out of her room with just underwear on! I'm going to assume he slept on the floor and leave it at that.

Cannot wait for more!

xoxo