Shattered Glass

[Adelle_fan1000]

That was a great update

Im glad He told belle about him and Kirsty...

[xknomex]

WOW

That was brilliant!!!

I cant believe he never told Kirsty. thats sooo sad. the way he said that sleeping with her brought back memory's of his granddad *tear*

I really really hope he tells Kisrty about him and Belle. Also I really think they should tell Jamie about Belle.

eek I love this fic!!

update soon

xxx

[Louise_2983]

absobloodylutely loved it best fan fic and best author

Aww that has just really cheered me up after a bad day! Thank you!

Thank you for all the nice comments everyone!

[Louise_2983]

Chapter 13

“Are you ok Belle?” Matilda asking in concern as Belle exited the bathroom.

“I’m fine” she lied. She was as far from fine as she could possibly be with a one way ticket and she didn’t know what to do about it.

“Are you sure? You look a little green?”

“A little? She’s giving ET a run for his money!” Drew cruelly chuckled.

“I’m just feeling a little sick, I’ll be fine”

“You’re not pregnant are you?!”

“Of course not!” she exclaimed before pausing, her eyes raised as she pondered.

Giving up she delved into her bag and checked frantically through her electronic diary.

“No definitely not pregnant, thank god!” she exclaimed having worked out her dates correctly.

“Thank god? Belle, think of the maintenance you could swindle out of him! He earns millions! God even I’d get pregnant if the kid was going to be a little gold mine! “

“I’ll be sure to tell Johnny you want to carry his babies the next time I see him Drew” she mocked with a slightly mischievous tone.

“Please don’t, I read those rumours about him swinging both ways!” he told her, completely seriously as she stuck her tongue out at him.

“Drew, even if he did he wouldn’t look twice at a loser like you!”

“So if you’re not pregnant, then what is wrong with you?” Matilda questioned worriedly.

“You mean apart from the fact that we’re getting ready for Irene’s funeral? Isn’t that enough?”

“Of course it is. But it seems like there’s something more” Matilda told her intuitively.

“It’s nothing” she lied, shaking her head in an attempt to appear nonchalant.

“Nothing to do with what I saw last night then?” Drew arched his jet black eyebrows at her dramatically.

“What did you see last night?” she questioned, cringing as she already knew what was coming next.

“You and Jefferies” he announced dramatically.

“ Attached at the lips”

“What?!” Matilda exclaimed, her eyes wide in shock as her mouth hung open slightly.

“It was just a kiss, it was nothing” Belle tried to shrug it off as they all stared at her waiting for an explanation. Even Ric, who had until now been minding his own business, aimed his gaze in her

direction.

“Stop looking at me like that!”

“We’ll he’s a married man tut tut tut Taylor” Drew teased, wagging a finger in her direction, and she could see he was getting pleasure from her discomfort.

“So what if he is? It still doesn’t make this any of your business!”

“I care about you Belle” Drew told her sincerely in a rare moment of seriousness.

“I don’t want you to get hurt”

“I’m not going to it was just a kiss, nothing more!”

“Nothing is ever “just” anything where you and Aden are involved Belle” Matilda declared matter of factly.

“Well this was!”

“Taylor, it just seems like all your troubles started since you first got involved with him”

“Oh how convenient that you just suddenly forget all the trouble you caused me! And what would you know anyway? Any of you? You all left! You have no idea what things were like between me

and Aden!”

“I know he’s no good for you!”

“He’s the father of my son! He gave me the most precious thing in my life”

“And that worked out really well for you didn’t it Taylor? He was barely 3 months old before you came running to Amanda sobbing your heart out about how you didn’t feel anything for him!”

“DREW!” Matilda hissed in a mixture of anger and disgust as Belle stared at Drew, her mouth gaping open in shock.

“I can’t believe you wo-, you know what Drew I’m not even going to dignify that with a response!” She snapped, storming into her bedroom and slamming the door shut with an almighty thud behind her.

As she sunk down onto the bed the door edge open and Matilda crept in quietly,

“So what really happened?”

“We kissed. That was it”

“Did he kiss you or did you kiss him?”

“Does it really matter?”

“It might help me understand the situation a bit better” Matilda shrugged.

“But if you don’t want to talk about it...”

“He kissed me”

“I knew it!”

“But!” Belle interrupted with a sigh.

“There was definite kissing back on my part.”

“So....” Matilda raised her eyebrows suggestively.

“How was it?”

“Matilda!” Belle exclaimed with a laugh as she threw a pillow in the direction of her friend. Matilda caught it and perched on the edge of the bed next to Belle.

“Oh come on Belle! I’ve been kissing the same guy for 10 years! If I can’t live vicariously through gossip then where’s the fun?”

“It was...it was...like we never stopped kissing each other”

“So it was just like when I kiss Ric? Geez Belle, I was expecting something better than that!”

Belle threw her head back as she let out a loud chuckle.

“You love Ric”

“I never said I didn’t”

“And I love Aden” she finally admitted out loud to a third party, to herself.

“And I don’t know about you but for me that means that every kiss is amazing. Like... like my heart is on fire”

“I don’t love Ric that much!” Matilda winked as Belle giggled again.

“But seriously Belle, what does this mean?”

“Nothing” she shook her head sadly.

“He’s married and we both agreed it was a mistake”

“And are you sure that agreement wasn’t the mistake and not the kiss?”

“Mattie, you’re not helping!” she sighed in exasperation.

“Well for once Drew and I actually agree on one thing. I care about you too and I don’t want you to get hurt. But unlike Drew I can see that being without Aden is probably going to hurt you a lot more

than being with him ever did”

“It’s not going to happen, this is just the way it’s got to be and as long as I get to be part of Jamie’s life then I’ll handle that. I have to”

“If that’s what you really want then fine but Belle not everyone finds someone who can set their heart on fire. Not everyone gets that and you have, just think carefully before you let it go without a fight”

A gentle knock at the door interrupted their conversation and they both looked up to find Ric in the doorway.

“Guys, people are starting to arrive and the hearse will be here soon”

“Coming now” Belle replied as she raised her body off the bed and took a quick glance at herself in the mirror. She smoothed down the satin material of her azure dress, still feeling like she should be in

black but knowing it wasn’t what Irene would have wanted.

“You ok?” Matilda asked gently, squeezing her hand tenderly.

“I thought she’d always be here Mattie” she whispered, biting back her tears.

“I know, I think we all did” Matilda replied as she pulled her friend into a comforting hug.

***

Belle gazed out at the sea of people before her, a blur of multicolour as far as her line of vision would allow. She knew she could do this but still she found herself trembling. Annie had made it the entire

way through her poem without crying and Geoff’s bible reading had been flawless. She owed it to them, to Irene, to get through this.

She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before finally beginning to speak.

“The first time I met Irene I was breaking into her car. The fact that ten years later I’m stood up here in front of you all giving the eulogy at her funeral is testament to the type of person Irene was. She

didn’t judge and she was always willing to give people a second chance because she was the first to admit that she had made mistakes in her life that she’d managed to move on from.

I came to Summer Bay in search of my biological mother. I was adopted as a baby and I spent my entire childhood dreaming of this incredible woman who would be an amazing mother simply because we shared the same genes. Of course when I eventually met her she wasn’t anything remotely like what I’d imagined and, although we’re close now, I have to admit that it did break my heart a little when I realised that just because someone gives birth to you or shares your DNA it doesn’t automatically make them a good person or a good mother”

She paused and allowed her gaze to wander into the crowd until she found them, tucked into a far corner. Aden, dressed in a grey suit, placed a protective arm around the young boy sat next to him as her heart leapt. She hadn’t expected him to bring Jamie and the truth in her words cut through her like the sharpest of knives as she watched her son sit quietly and well behaved.

She had given birth to him but she hadn’t been a good mother and that almost killed her. Struggling with the realisation she managed to somehow find the composure to continue.

“Irene was both, Both a good person and a good mother. But not just to her biological children; Nathan, Finn and Damien. Irene opened up her house, her life and her heart to so many other people who needed her. Most recently Annie, Geoff and myself but over the years there have been many others. Many who are here today and others who couldn’t be here, Tasha, Hayley, Will and Nick, but who I am sure feel Irene’s absence just as much as I do.

Irene didn’t give birth to me, we didn’t share DNA and for over half of my life I didn’t even know her. But she was my mother. Not the one I dreamt of for years. She wasn’t perfect and we didn’t always agree on things. But she loved me, she supported me through the hardest times of my life and she gave me the one thing that was really missing from my life. She gave me a home and people to call my family. And I just hope that one day I’ll get a chance to be as good a mother as Irene was to me and to all the other people who were lucky enough to have been part of her family”

She placed extra emphasis on the final sentence as she looked Aden directly in the eye and hoped he realised just how much she meant it.

***

“Belle? Are you coming?” Geoff asked gently as the crowd of people Irene had called her friends and family began to leave the cemetery, leaving only Belle stood by the open grave gazing down at the

coffin inside.

“I just need a minute Geoff” she whispered and he nodded in understanding, briefly placing his hand on her shoulder, before following the others towards the cars waiting to take them back to The Beach

House.

As she gazed at the dozens of floral tributes surrounding the grave and the deep red roses scattered over the top of the coffin she felt her eyes mist over and struggled to retain her tears. A flood of

memories came gushing back as she recalled not just the happy times but the fights and the tears and everything Irene had stood by her through.

Her arms hung idly at her sides as she let out a little whimper. Suddenly she felt a warm, tiny hand tug at her own and curve its fingers around hers with complete ease as though he did it every day.

“Don’t cry Belle” he told her as she looked down at him.

“Nanny Irene didn’t want us to cry”

“I know” she whispered through her tears as she knelt down to his level, their hands still together.

“But sometimes we can’t help it. I’m sad that Irene’s not here anymore”

“Me too” he nodded.

“But Daddy says we should be happy that we knew her even it was only for a little while”

“He’s right” she smiled.

“And I am happy for that. Irene was very special to me”

“She was special to lots of people” he told her wisely as she nodded.

“That’s why lots of people came to say goodbye to her”

“Is that for her?” Belle nodded towards the single red rose he clutched in his hand and he nodded.

“We had to stand near the back but Daddy says I can give it to her now if you make sure I don’t fall down there with her!” he told her, a little giggle escaping his tiny frame as she laughed with him.

She let go of his hand and instead wrapped her arms gently around his waist and manoeuvred them both closer to the edge of the grave.

“I’ve got you” she whispered as she felt his body lean forward against his arms before he gently tossed the rose onto the coffin.

“Bye bye Nanny Irene” he whispered innocently.

“Thank you for looking after me and playing hide and seek I had lots of fun”

Belle chuckled imagining Irene sending Jamie off to hide so she could get 5 minutes rest.

“I’m sure she had lots of fun too” she whispered into his ear, her lips gently brushing against his skin as she did so.

“See you in heaven Nanny Irene” he finished as Belle enveloped him in a comforting hug.

***

“Belle?” he almost sang as he appeared in her doorway. Quickly she tried to wipe away her tears and shut the photo album she had been looking at. Having grown tired of being told how sorry people

were she had snuck away into her room. She knew they were genuine but there were only so many times she could hear it.

“Are you crying again?” he asked accusingly.

“No” she lied.

“Are you sure?” he looked at her dubiously.

“Because you’re eyes look like they’re leaking”

“I’m just looking at old photos” she told him as he climbed up onto the bed next to her.

“Can I see?” he asked excitedly and for a few minutes they poured over the photos together until Aden appeared in the doorway.

“There you are” he proclaimed and she wasn’t sure whether he was addressing her or their son.

“Daddy!” Jamie exclaimed.

“Belle’s showing me photos of you in fancy dress!”

“Fancy dress?” he asked confused.

“Jamie that isn’t fancy dress, that’s just how your Daddy used to dress” Belle chuckled as she held up the photo to show Aden the patterned shirt Jamie had assumed was fancy dress.

“But it’s funny and fancy dress is funny” Jamie laughed.

“Jamie, go into the kitchen and find Kirsty please”

“Daddy can’t I stay in here? I didn’t mean it about your shirt!” he pleaded.

“I know you didn’t but I need to talk to Belle in private ok?”

“Ok” Jamie nodded before turning to Belle.

“Don’t cry when I’m not here to cheer you up!” he ordered with an adorable grin.

“I won’t”

“Promise?”

“Promise”

“Cross your heart and hope to d-“

“Jamie! Just go please!” Aden laughed and his son obeyed his command, leaving the room with a tiny wave to Belle.

“I didn’t think you’d bring Jamie” she told him when he was safely out of earshot.

“He wanted to say goodbye. If I hadn’t let him come he would have seen funerals as something to worry about and there not. It’s death we have to worry about”

“You’re right. You were right to let him come” she nodded.

“I think we should tell him Belle, that you’re his mother”

“Do you think he’s ready for that?”

“Belle the longer we leave it the harder it’s going to get and if we tell him then you won’t need me to be there when you spend time with him anymore and then we won’t have to be around each other

anymore”

“So this isn’t about Jamie this is about creating distance between us because you can’t trust yourself otherwise?” she snapped annoyed that he would use Jamie like this.

“It’s about what’s right. It’s right to tell Jamie the truth and it’s right for us to stay away from each other”

“It didn’t feel like that last night” she whispered, her heart breaking slightly.

“It was just a kiss Belle”

“We both know it was more than that Aden!”

“I told Kirsty last night” he blurted out, "about my granddad and what he did to me"

“I told her and she’s still here and I have a family with her”

“No” she sighed shaking her head.

“You don’t. You have my son”

“You said yourself today, biology counts for nothing Belle”

“And what about us do we count for nothing?” she asked tears threatening to break free again.

“Just be at my place at 7 o’clock tomorrow and we’ll tell Jamie together” he ordered, ignoring her question, and not even stopping to look at her before he left the room.

[Taniya_K]

Aw! Jamie! I'm in love with that little boy [not in that way of course...] He's just toooooo sweet and innocent! Reminds me of the cheeky Aden

Loved Belle's eulogy for Irene and how she spoke about being a mother, although it did come back to bite her at the end.

I can't believe that Aden could be so cold about that. And Kirsty. If he told her, I can't believe she's staying with him, or him with her. Not smart, Aden. Not smart at all.

The beginning made me laugh, until Drew ruined it with his stuff about Belle/Aden/Jamie. But even after, the Belle/Mattie stuff was funny too.

I can't wait to see them tell Jamie now.

xoxo

[Louise_2983]

I can't believe that Aden could be so cold about that. And Kirsty. If he told her, I can't believe she's staying with him, or him with her. Not smart, Aden. Not smart at all.

xoxo

Just to clarify he told her about the abuse not the kiss.

[Taniya_K]

Oh, right. Sorry, I thought it was about the kiss. That makes a lot more sense now.

Thanks for clearing that up for me. I'm a bit slow today

xoxo

[jenpen08]

Oh that was heart breaking! Poor Belle, I wish they'd just nip this lets do the right thing suff in the bud! Sooo sad!

Jamie as ever was the cutest little thing, I love him!!

As always Louise great update!!

[leah1234]

Poor belle. Poor Aden. Poor everybody

I actually thought he told kirsty about the kiss too. But I wish that he hadn't, I like the way it was a part of him and belle

can't wait to see where this goes

Update soon

xxxxxxxxxxx

[Red Ranger 1]

Belle and Jamie are so cute together and I think they should tell him she's her mum.Loved her eulogy, it was absolutely true and honest.

I'm actually really glad that Aden told Kirsty about his abuse because I don't think it would have been fair otherwise, her not understanding why he acted the way he did and probably thinking she was the problem.

Glad that Belle's got her friends around her.